how is it that i've found myself with a question on repeat pulsating on tissues grown tender..? how is it that i have these episodes of the typical breaking between crisp flashes of the incredible?
all i want from him, sometimes, is the touch of a cupped hand against my shoulder.. something. some appreciation other than "thank you" from someone who reaps the benefit of my being a bit of a pushover. i like you. i care for you and i make sure that you know it. should i stop? should i play your game? will you want me more often or like me better if i, once again, become a stranger? i know my every happiness does not depend on you. but there have been incidents careening into the thought, to myself, "i'm not happy..." either with you or with what you're not doing or saying. i don't need you to be an exaggeration. i don't need to be coddled. i just need to feel something. i need you to reciprocate in actions or emotion or converstaion. i do not think i am being unreasonable in this. said simply, i want what you want, my dear, i want what you're getting from me.. i don't ask you for too much.
00:59 - Wednesday, Aug. 11, 2004
Recent entries:
oday.html">the 3 month countdown begins - 05 May 2018
anothrburst.html">another burst - this used to be my playground
newlife.html">begin at the beginning. - 10 April 2008
moody.html">a blanket for a bad mood under the sun. - 25 March 2007
emilludwig.html">...kissing a fool... - 05 December 2006
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